Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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