I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I think I sprained my soul last night
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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