Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
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Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
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If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I deserve this hangover.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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