Quick, to the slutcave!
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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