Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
my sisters under your porch take her home
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
