When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize
