i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Randomize