im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
there was a trapeze. enough said
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
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FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
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