It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'm always down for nudity.
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