we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
