You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
