No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
