**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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