Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
