Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
