just tell him i said nine months
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
