I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize