we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
