Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize