i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
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