I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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