just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize