I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you would pick up someone in the library
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
