I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
