Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
That accounts for only three of the penises
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Come share oat with me in your robe
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
