I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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