You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize