My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
