Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
