i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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