Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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