I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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