you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
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I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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