so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize