Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
