As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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