My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
