He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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