I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
We need to rekindle our bromance
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
