i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
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