I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
