I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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