lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
They are going to name an STD after you.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
