The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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