It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
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Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
how do you play pong handcuffed?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
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Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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