Don't make out with my wife yet
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I'm like, not good at living.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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