i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Pooping to opera.
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