Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me