she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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