Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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