your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
